decisions and background

I’ve been looking over my LiveJournal account and well I just like this place better. I figured out how to change dates on blog posts so, along with writing I will be transferring all my blog posts on to here.

I wanted to give a little background before I actually do this. Don’t ask me why, it’s not like I have a following. It might make more since for anyone who reads this post, before all the changes are made.  Or it will just make me feel better. I’m not really sure.

So anyway I’m a 30 something female who just moved back in to my mothers house, with her under 3 yr old son. I’ve lived with her off and on since I was 18, usually I don’t stay over 3 months. We are at that point right now and I so want out of here.

I probably come off as a total bitch, and ungrateful. I’m not, but I am, things are complicated and there is a lot of bad history. I needed to move from my ex’s because it was, at the end, like living in a horror movie. There were fun and endearing moments, but you were always waiting for the next time someone gets killed.

Living with my mom in comparison is like living in some movie like “As the River Runs Though It” or I don’t know… “The Color Purple?” (I’m drawing a blank on good movies that are kinda agonizing to watch because of their overuse of painful and constant real life drama. or Precious for a more recent movie). Without any sexual or real physical abuse of course.

Sometimes I make fun of myself because my life has gone from a poor-girl version of The Hills to a bad Lifetime Movie. Sometimes it makes me laugh, other times I cry.

I’m trying desperately to make changes, to make a better life for myself and my son. Sometimes I get stuck and don’t know what to do. I guess this blog will be full of those scenes from the above movies, so if you like those you may like this. But maybe not ; )

On a side note I found and read part of a “activities journal” I was making. It made me think of the old times when I loved my life. You see as much as I may use movie references I’ve really a music freak. I love live music. I love music. I have really bad taste, at least that is what the real critics and hard core fans would say. But it doesn’t bother me. More on that another time. It was bitter sweet to see and read.

Good night for now


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