sat night

so today ive been told by my mother that i desrve to be beat and that ive been nothing but a problem most of my life. its the sort of thing you dont forget. its the kind of thing you dont forgive. funny ive thought my life would be easier if she wasnt in it since i was at least 16. part of me has always known she felt that way. shee blames me for everything bad in her life. well she really has no one to blame but herself. yeah im pretty much done with this. im going to start calling rooms for rent tomorrow. i wish i could live in my god mothers old house. it is just sitting there empty. some kind of sick shrine to her. her mom is kinda whacked in the head. things are so bad here right now that its making my abusive ex look good. i really hate her most of the time. did i mention shecalled me useless too. but thats no big deal she says that all the time. now i have to go out there and get the baby milk. hes asked a few times now so hes not joking. i need to get some supplies in here so i dont have to leave when shes like this. wish me luck

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