Fucked Day

Well it started off like any other day, actually it had the promise of being a great morning. My mom was sleeping like a baby. actually much better. Then my stupid sister decides she wants to wake her up to use the car to get breakfast. It would be great, except that well we had to wake her up!

So she gets woke up and as I was trying to figure out what I want from a menue I’ve hardly ever seen (and wasn’t in front of me) my mom starts on me. Hurry up can’t you see she’s trying to leave. Come on what’s wrong with you?

Well that just did it. I started yelling about how I hated her and that as much as she hated me well right back at her.

We didn’t talk for a while then my sister came back and got into it because my mom was crying. A lot of stuff came up. along with me getting thrown out. and telling her that she made me feel so bad I wished I was dead.

I don’t think i’m really thrown out, but I do need to get out of here as soon as I can.

I take a shower, pull myself together and get ready to go see ex – baby daddy. Things are going relatively well. He was hinting at dating someone. then by the end of the day he tells me he is probably going to start seeing someone.  Someone who is like 10 years younger than either of us. He says well he’d rather it be me than anyone else, but he needs more in a relationship than I am giving him. (aka sex).

I shouldn’t care. I prayed for this, but I still cry. he says he isn’t going too. Still crying I tell him he should. I don’t know what he’s going to do. I really want him to start seeing someone else. I just don’t understand why i’m upset.


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