Tonight was pretty bad. He threw a construction tape measure at the tv & almost broke it.
He started with us breaking up because he can’t stand his life and the house. Then he said he was going to take the baby.
I couldn’t stop shaking and crying. I tried to control every emotion that came across my face. I tried to do what said was will make people more sympathetic. I went against my instincts & personality and acted submissive & kept my eyes down and mouth shut.
It sorta worked. I didn’t get hit. Evidently I undermine his masculinity by having a different opinion than his. I don’t give a shit really except that I don’t want to be hit.
That’s not enough of a reason. In history tyrants are the ones who fall to cupts. He said I could be the queen, but that HE was the king. Fuck that I’m queen fucking Elizabeth, I need no king. (Not literally, I’m not delusion al)
He said we should break up after the funeral, he said he was sorry I was terrified of him, he asked if liked him. I lied, for the most part, & said most of the time I did. But that ii didn’t when he was crazy & being an ass hole.
He said sometime I made him hate his life. I was thinking just sometimes? Well shit you got it better than me. Sent on the Sprint® Now Network from my BlackBerry®