to start a quote as me: being a cold hearted bitch doesn’t keep me warm at night but it does keep me alive.
okay so I’m speaking this is say anything it’s a little crazy as a spare with me.
he peed the bed again last night 2 nights in a row this time technically last night it was the floor surfaces in the room with funny because hey I didn’t wanna have anything to do with him after while sending him drinking 4 32 & having to have sex again for the second day in a row.
I really hate not being able to control my life around him makes me sick. I’m working on leaving the first thing I’m trying to do is get another job hello have a little bit more money I need to get this place cleaned too. just a few things to do I can do it I know I can do it I have to I don’t have a choice in this once no more than I have a choice when it comes to worse have to do with him while he’s here I’ll try.
I wish I had this printed out out somewhere somewhere I can see it all the time and be reminded of everything he’d done to me over last for years.
this isn’t even everything actually I dont have everything on here who started to put things on here but got distracted. maybe really delicious too painful having to go through everything in place change names.
it’s not all bad as it is in yesterday I was a wreck all day i had to get up after four & half hour sleep because he’s an inconsiderate.
of course it was his fault I was up so late I was such a wreck I couldn’t sleep until 3 o’clock in the morning.
I have not perfect I’m done things wrong the when you have to deal with someone like him all the time makes you crazy I’m under so much so stress, no one, nobody anywhere could function which is much stress is I have to endure on a daily basis.
I wanna bitch I wanna whine I wanna moan, I wanna scream from the mountain tops. but I don’t what I do is talk to you and a few other people once in awhile it’s not enough.
I don’t know if anything is enough. what I do know that I gotta keep trying to keep working at things. I’ve gotta keep going that’s the only thing that is gonna save us