a few weeks into May

I’m so bad at writing here when I dont’ have an obligation lol

Even when I have updates in my life. I really do need to keep up with stuff more, for myself.

Anyway very few J sightings or “interactions.” We did have a look about a week ago? He was working and we ended up across from each other at a light. This guy looked so fine I’m not even totally sure it’s him. Anyway, I looked, may have done some surprise look then when involuntarily into the I want to fuck you right now look. He had glasses on so I couldn’t see the exact expression. There was some sort of head movement. Maybe surprise or even shock? It wasn’t like an eww move your head back and give yourself a triple chin thing. Then he kept looking towards me. I can’t be sure if it was at me or past me though.

Did a spell to encourage him to contact me. It has varying results in the past. It’s been about a week and no contact so, he either hates me, it resisting with all his might or it’s just not working…

Anyway been trying to move on. A few guys from the past have shown up. One lives in another state and is quite complicated. We’re too much alike, as in we’re both a little cray cray. lol

The other doesn’t give me enough attention. But he keeps coming around. So I’m going to use my impressive skills in overwhelming and annoying to “how to lose a guy in 10 days” him. I’ve also nick-named it J him. Because well that was an example of all the things to do to drive someone away lol

One of my friends said that will be a great thing to document. So There you have my next blog project.

As of right now we haven’t talked much. He sent a message about a month ago asking something like how have you been wanna hang out soon? I think I said something like i’m good sure that would be fun.

then I didn’t hear from him. I sent something else a week or two later that was along the lines of how are you? what have you been up to. He replied with been really busy, we’ll see each other soon enough. or some shit like that.

I left it alone and wrote him off. Wrote him off so much so that when he msg me last friday I forgot I’d even talked to him. He asked me what my plans were for this week. I waited 2 hrs then wrote back “I’ve got a few things going on, but what were you thinking?

No reply.

The next day I msg’d his brother asking him if he knew what was up his ass because I was tempted to block him. Again.

No reply.

Since I was already on a roll I figured I’d just roll with it. And now we have our new project. 🙂

Earlier this morning I sent an additional msg asking how his weekend was. He has logged onto Facebook (because I saw him come up on chat as being logged in) but my msg hasn’t been “tagged” as read yet. Perhaps it was missed, perhaps he’s ignoring me. I’m hoping I can get him to block me, because I really don’t want to deal with his wishy washy everything on my terms shit.

That’s not me, never has been and it never will be.

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